ALLRIGHT – I GOT IT.
100% Russian Mafia-proof ghetto street smart aint no mo fo bro gonna get into your stuff Equifax answering ABSOLUTELY HACK PROOF FILES!
For just $19.99/month (payable annually for $239.88) save your files in complete security. We guarantee these files from North Korean ISIS loving Alt-Magnetic Resonance dufus scanners, multi national language variable algorythms, and guarantee that they are 100% Gluten Free (if ya don’t eat ’em).
They accept both languages, American and Southern, and are available in several purdy colors.
Keep your data safe with me –
(Available in 1MB and the 250 page 2MB sizes)