For all those demure, shy, intraverts out there, it’s time to take heart and learn to be assertive. There are some things in life that absolutely require that you take a stand. If you don’t, you will end up missing out on a lot of opportunities and getting trampled by other people. So here are some situations that will require you to get a backbone and stand up for yourself a bit!
Family. When it comes to family, you want all of your relationships to be balanced. If you have a sibling or a parent that doesn’t give you the same respect you give them, then that is obviously not a balanced relationship. The point of a family relationship is to support each other in whatever circumstances. So make sure you exert enough effort to make it a balance of give and take.
Dating. If you are a man, you need to pluck up that courage and make the move. There are plenty of girls out there who are perfectly capable of making the move for you, but she doesn’t want to date a man who is a limp noodle. You need to show some initiative to make her feel like you have the capacity to take care of her. And girls, don’t let a man push you around. Have an opinion and contradict him sometimes. You don’t have to fight with him, but express an opinion once in a while and make yourself more than just a plain Jane.
Health. We all know that doctors are busy people. Many of them have so much on their plate that they don’t have time to address all of your health issues unless you specifically ask them to. However, remember that you are paying them and have the freedom to go somewhere else if you don’t like the service you are receiving. Thus, if a doctor isn’t giving you the attention you deserve, then you must ask for it. If you pose your concerns with firm sincerity and a true plea for help, they are going to listen. In the end, you will be glad you flexed your assertiveness muscles in order to help you feel as healthy as possible. If you are needlessly suffering, you only have yourself to blame for not insisting on more help.
Home. When speaking of home, I mean not just the actual structure, but all of your personal items as well as what happens inside and out. Your home is exactly that, “yours.” If you are paying for it then you have the right to dictate what goes on inside and outside of it. That means laying down the law when your kids want to have a wild party. It’s also great to lend things out to neighbors or compromise on having that neighbor’s trees shedding leaves on your freshly cut grass. However, if someone takes advantage of the space that you have purchased for yourself and your family, then you are in your rights to take a stand. It’s ok to say no if someone wants to borrow your lawn mower, but you don’t feel comfortable lending it out to them.
Job. Face it, the people who are more assertive tend to get the jobs. Employers want someone who can express an opinion and show ingenuity. If you want to get the job of your dreams, or any good job for that matter, you need to learn to show assertiveness in the interview and the workplace. You don’t have to overwhelm others with it, but act confident and offer an opinion here and there. This is always hardest in an interview or your first few weeks on the job as you get a handle on things.
As you learn to become more assertive, you will find that a balanced life is very enjoyable. It takes practice to overcome the fear of sharing your opinions. So get started today and take a stand on something small, even if it’s just a restaurant giving you Root Beer instead of Coke!
About the Author
Tiffani Azani is a motivational writer for MyCollegesandCareers.com. My Colleges and Careers gets people to get off the couch, get back to school and get in the career of their dreams. The Colleges and Careers Web site provides a listing online schools are what they are looking for.